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Merry Christmas...

from everyone at Hounslow Chronicle online Read

Sept 4: A stunning discovery...

We are not the only people with a pet tomato. Read

August 29: Clive is reborn

As you know, the walnut killers had been dripping a poison called juglone onto Clive and we'd been unintentionally helping it get to the plant's roots every time we watered our 'pet'. Read

August 22: La Tomatina

In at least one way the news that Clive's producing fewer and fewer fruit is good news. It means that the office idiots will not be able to carry out their threat of bringing La Tomatina to Hounslow. Read

August 14: Ethnic cleansing

Guess what.... walnut trees like to kill tomato plants. Read

August 8: Rat attack!

Our hunt for wolf urine, taking in the Pound Shop, has drawn a blank so far Read

August 1: Clive is suffering from sheer exhaustion

There's no doubt about it, Clive is a shadow of its former self. Read

July 29: Bad hair day

Clive's pruning has not gone down as well as we might have expected. Or hoped for. Read

July 23: A spot of tea

Well a plane didn't land on the office, David Beckham hasn't popped in for a cup of tea on his way to Brentford FC and, most importantly, Clive is still in one piece. Read

July 21: While the cat's away

Yet another edict from the editor causes uproar in the 'rank and file'. We print it in full as there is absolutely no chance she will know we've done it. Read

July 17: Economic woes plague Clive

We all have to economise, what with the shares gloom, fuel prices, housing market and credit crunch. Read

July 14: We are not alone

We Are Not Alone. Across the area covered by hounslowchronicle.co.uk a series of UFO spotters come forward to reveal how they watched weird lights in the sky. Read

July 11: Shower time for Clive

Rain, and more rain. Strangely, Hounslow Chronicle news editor Dan Lyons has not been called upon to do a repeat of his Superman act of rushing out into the flood to rescue Clive. Read

July 10: Clive saved by human resources

Tomato War has ended, at least for now, in the Hounslow Chronicle office and everyone is trying to appear effective, efficient and organised. Read

July 9: Tomatoes are so evil

Polarised, there's a good word. And it sums up office opinion after the Tom Shaw blight debacle. Read

July 8: Salmonella scare

So far so good. The editor has not spotted we are monitoring the policing of poor Tom Shaw. Read

July 7: Infectious

Guess what hounslowchronicle.co.uk has a scoop. Read

July 4: First aid

We don't have room for babies in the Hounslow Chronicle office. Whimper about a paper cut or trip over a sleeping sub editor and you can expect no sympathy. Read

July 1: Poison myth

Guess what we've discovered? It was mostly posh people in Elizabethan times who thought tomatoes were poisonous. Read

June 30: The history of tomatoes

More orangey-red tomatoes greet us on arrival this sunny Monday morning. Read